May 19, 2011 Sentencing Day (My Victory!!)

Let me start by saying...every time I have gone to court I do the same thing (as I was instructed to do by the District Attorney) show up at 8:30 am, I tell them that I am the victim and provide the defendants name.  I tell them I need to speak to the District Attorney...today was different as far as attitudes.  Lucky for me my girlfriend Sandy went with me to court (thank you girlfriend!!)

I approach the bailiff in Department 24 (same bailiff I've seen the past 4 times) Mr. Ramirez, as I walk up to the desk he walks away.  The room is filled with people so I stand and wait for him to return.  As he walks back to his little desk approximately 5 minutes later I inform him that I'm the victim of the  B. Holguin case...he just stands their and says, "Ok what", I said, "I need to speak with the District Attorney Mr. Carr because he requested I do so and inform him that I will be addressing the court." The bailiff gave me a funny look and said, "I know who you are.  You already addressed the court last time. You don't need to do it again the judge already heard what you have to say.  You know we have a very busy calendar here today and it's not necessary to speak every time so why don't you just go sit down." (this was all said in a sarcastic voice).  I told the bailiff Mr. Ramirez, "just go get the District Attorney I want to speak to him.

(for a moment I was in shock...I could not believe this man was speaking to me like that.  Was I now the criminal? What did I do to deserve that attitude from the bailiff?  Why the attitude today?)

I stood waiting while the bailiff took his time going to speak to the District Attorney.  Mr. Carr turned around and immediately came over to speak to me.  I introduced myself and said that I wanted to address the court. He told me it would not be a problem he already put a note on the file.  Mr. Carr apologized for his behavior and told me that Mr. Gardner had chewed him out because I said a few things about our phone conversation. Mr. Carr said that he reviewed the case and Mr. Holguin needs to be sent to prison. He said that he was really sorry if he made me feel like he didn't give a shit because he does.  He said that the system is difficult and protects the criminal and not the victim.  I told him that I learned that first hand..I've been to court for 2 years now waiting for the defendant to be sent to prison.  I asked Mr. Carr if we were going to end it and not continue for another day.  Mr. Carr said they were going to request a 3 year prison sentence and see if they accept.  Ok.. sounds good I went to go sit down and wait.....the court room is still filled with people..........................10:00 am..........................10:30 am.....................11:30 am....................I told my girlfriend that I had NEVER had to wait that long.  I was told they ALWAYS accommodate the victim and move the case up as a courtesy......11:50 am we are told they are going to break for lunch at 12:00. (ARE YOU KIDDING ME) as the time goes on they take every other case in the room and my girlfriend and I are the only two in the room (visitor side).  As the time goes on I start to get upset.  Did this have something to do with the bailiff and the public defender Mr. Beaty??? Hmmm. I had to wonder... The clock hit 12:00 and the judge Mrs. Arroyo announces that we are breaking for lunch.  The bailiff walks over to my girlfriend and I and in a VERY stern voice says, "CLEAR THE COURT ROOM.  Everyone has to leave now." I asked what time should we return and the bailiff hesitated as if he didn't hear what I said...I waited a moment and with his attitude he just said 1:30.

We go back to court at 1:30 and wait for the door to open.  We are still the only two on the visitor side...all of a sudden approximately 20 inmates are brought in and the defendant is one of them.  I always feel this nervousness in my stomach when I see him. The good thing this time...I didn't have those quick flashback moments like I usually do of that horrible night.  The defendant has never looked directly at me and today he did just that.  The clock now says 2:30 and nothing yet...3:30 and they finally call the case.

I hear Case number 53 defendant Holguin.  The judge starts talking to the public defender  and I walk over to the podium.  The District Attorney Mr. Carr informs the judge that I am present and would like to address the court.  The public defender Mr. Beaty rudely says, "that is not necessary your honour, we have heard her already, she addressed the court last time we not need to hear it again.  The judge Mrs. Arroyo makes a comment and says, yes, we have already hear from you last time. (Can you just imagine how that made me feel? when I get upset it makes me want to cry.  I tried to hold it back) I asked the judge then what about restitution? I have not heard a thing about that and I have sent my paperwork in 3 times now.  The probation department said, we have the paperwork your honour it just needs to be signed.  The public defender Mr. Beaty said, OH, NO let me see that paperwork because my client and I are not going to sign anything. They were all told to approach the bench.  The restitution was for the hospital bill, ambulance bill and my moving expenses of $2500.00 The total was $16,000.00 and that was with the hospital giving a 6,000 credit off the  bill.  As I am standing at the podium waiting to see what the discussion is all about the public defender Mr. Beaty has the nerve to question the moving expenses and say, "no way, we are not paying for that lets go to court.  We are available at the end of July for this hearing."  Up to this point I was holding myself together very well. The District Attorney and Probation Department both walked over to me to explain that the public defender is having an issue.  I can feel myself just getting angry...this is ridiculous.  YOU people have had my paperwork for over 1 year and I'm now finding out about this.  The probation department said, I know Jacqueline, it's a game.  This is how it will work.  If you waive the $2500.00 he will accept the 3 years and go to prison right away.. if you don't we will go to trial and the defendant will sit in jail until after the trial and then go to prison....the public defender wants to go to trial in July so he can rack up more credits.  I am now beside myself.  I told both the probation department and district attorney loud enough for all to hear.  THIS IS RIDICULOUS! If he would not have beaten me up I would not have had to move.   It's not the dollar amount, but the principal of the matter! Why should the defendant have any say in this when you have all the paperwork showing the note for the loan and my paychecks where the company was taking out of my payroll checks.  Again, the defendant gets his way.  I told them all that I needed a few minutes to think about it and I also needed to calm down.  GREAT, here goes the tears.  A police officer walked over and gave me some tissue and I went to sit and talk to my girlfriend.  I knew I had to see him sentenced today and I was not about to put myself in a situation where I had to go back to that.  My girlfriend told me the same thing...let his ass to to prison today.

The judge  called other cases and came back to mine.  I am feeling so upset and I'm holding back tears.  I'm frustrated because the they are trying to keep me quiet and I have something to say!  I walk back to the podium and now I speak and don't care if I'm allowed or not.  I try to fight back my tears as I feel all eyes on me. I tell the judge how disappointed I am with the way my case has been handled.  I am the victim and I've had to fight for 2 years to get some type of justice for myself, my kids and my family.  This has been a long 2 years and it's just not right.  Today I'm waiving the 2500.00 which is just ridiculous and I don't understand why the defendant is so protected and I have to continue to fight.  I will waive that amount but know that it's the principal of the matter and I want to see the defendant sentenced to prison today.

As I look over the public defender and the defendant are talking and sharing a laugh.  One of the cops is looking at me and I could see he felt really bad by his facial expressions and then he looked over "at them" and just shook his head.  Do you know how that made me feel.  It just really upset me that that behavior is allowed.

The judge told me she was sorry I felt that way, but she has rules that she has to follow. She said I have to work with the defendants and the victims and the victims are not always happy.  I hope you can find some kind  of closure now.  Good luck to you.

Judge Arroyo reads the sentence and asks if he pleads guilty to the charges and accepts the 3 year prison terms.  The defendant agrees and is sentenced to 3 years in prison.

The District Attorney walks over and shakes my hand and tell me what a great job I've done.  I told him that I'm so disappointed in the system because the criminals are so protected.  Our system caters to them and it's not fair.  The District Attorney agreed and said he was sorry about that and it's true.  He said our system and people like Mr. Beaty protect criminals.  He said it gets difficult to work for the system, but he does the best job he can do every day to protect the innocent.  The probation officer walked over and said great job, we finally got him! He needed to be sent to prison and there it is.  Good job and good luck to you.

OH, did I mention that I was told that it was up to the public defender Beaty today on when the case was called.  I was told he did that intentionally delayed the case until the end of the day....now how is that for being fair to the victim..

I felt this huge weight lifted off my shoulders.  I celebrated with my girl!!